GREG GUTFELD: A Democrat exposes the ‘fake outrage’ on Capitol Hill

Happy Thursday, everyone. I’m sorry that I was out yesterday, but if you could see how silky smooth my back is right now, you’d understand. F.Y.I. my waxer started a GoFundMe to cover her therapy bills. Get well soon, Tatiana. But it’s a good day to mark your calendar because we may have found an honest politician. Jeff Jackson, a North Carolina Democrat and freshman Rep., I’m sorry a fresh-person Rep., looked into a camera and said something we’ve all suspected but couldn’t prove, that his colleagues are a bunch of phonies who don’t believe a word of their own —-. Well, it was nice knowing you, Jeff. Say hello to Hillary before you’re Jeffrey Epstein’d.

REP. JEFF JACKSON, D-N.C.: I’m still brand new to Congress. I’ve only been there 100 days, and I don’t know if I’m not supposed to say this out loud, but it’s true and important and if you don’t know this, you need to. It’s really clear from working there for just a few months that most of the really angry voices in Congress are totally faking it. These people who have built their brands around being perpetually outraged. It’s an act.

Really, Jeff? Wow. You must be the next Columbo. Thanks for connecting the dots for us. All this time I thought politicians were as legit as John Fetterman’s recovery, the congressman continued.

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REP. JEFF JACKSON, D-N.C.: I’ve been in committee meetings that are open to the press and committee meetings that are closed. The same people who act like maniacs during the open meetings are suddenly calm and rational during the closed ones. Why? Because there aren’t any cameras in the closed meetings, so their incentives are different. What I’ve seen is that members of Congress are surrounded by negative incentives. There are rewards for bad behavior.

Amazing, that’s, I’ve got to say, that’s as a refreshing as sitting on a frozen peppermint patty. It’s great for hemorrhoids.

PANELIST: Why do you keep looking at me?

I don’t know. I haven’t seen you in a year and a half. But yes, that’s called performance art, Jeff. And it comes courtesy of the I-word that he used incentives. The more you act up, the more you end up on TV. I wonder if we can find any examples of this.

REP. JAMAAL BOWMAN, D-N.Y.: Look at the data. You’re not looking at any data. You’re carrying the water for the gun lobby. Look at the data, more guns equal more deaths… have you ever worked in the store? You did not answer my question, do not stop and talk to me…

And the Oscar goes to? It looks like that workshop with Jussie Smollett really paid off. And of course, if there were no cameras, there would be no drama, and Bowman wouldn’t be vying for that Oscar. Which is why I think cameras should only be banned except in certain places, like the changing rooms at H&M and Bill Hemmer’s bedroom. But this crap happens all the time. Remember these performance artists?

REP. MAXINE WATERS, D-CA: You get out, and you create a crowd. And you push back on them, and you tell them they’re not welcomed.

LAWMAKER: That is not right. That is not fair and that is what we are fighting as well.

SEN. CHUCK SCHUMER, D-N.Y.: Kavanaugh you have released the whirlwind, and you will pay the price.

REP. ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ, D-N.Y.: Don’t tell me this is about consistency. Don’t tell me that this is about a condemnation of anti-Semitic remarks… Don’t tell me because I didn’t get a single apology when my life was threatened. Thank you.

Talk about drama. If you hammed it up anymore, Brian Stelter might put you in a hoagie. Of course, you can’t forget the patron saint of fake outrage. Take it away, sis.

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She’s amazing, and I’m always wondering, I bet you are, too, where is she now?

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Wow, she’s still screaming. Of course, it’s not just the Dems, right, Adam?

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REP. ADAM KINZINGER, R-Ill.: I never expected the day to be quite as emotional for me as it has been… But you guys won. You guys held. You know, democracies are not defined by our bad days.

You know, he looks like he’s choking on a hamster, but on both ends. Hmm. They’re disgusted, I know. But it’s like the observer effect in quantum physics, observing a system has an effect on that system. For example, I know you’re watching me right now, which is the only reason I bathed, but at least for me, it’s a hygiene matter. For these idiots, it’s only about amplifying anger to keep us divided.

REP. JEFF JACKSON, D-N.C.: The big thing that modern media and modern politicians have learned is that if they can keep you angry, they’ll hold your attention. And they both want your attention. So if you’re a politician, and you show certain media outlets that you can help them keep their audience angry, they’ll give you their audience. And because so many politicians are willing to play that game, now they’re in competition with each other to see how fake angry they can be.

They should have awards for this. Call them the golden globalists. Uh. All right. Yeah. Yeah. Shut up. No, but it works. Take Justin Pearson, and who could forget his amazing transition from 2016 to now? Here are two clips of the same guy before and after discovering the joy of fakery.

JUSTIN PEARSON 2016: I’m Justin J. Pearson, and I’m running for president of BSG. I want to bring together different voices, dissenting voices, voices that may be more liberal or more conservative in order that we can reach a point of sort of the radical middle.

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JUSTIN PEARSON 2023: Fighting for the LGBTQ community, fighting for those who are single mothers, fighting for those who are ostracized, fighting for those… My savior, my black Jesus.

They should investigate who put Rogaine in the Memphis water supply. That transition would make Caitlyn Jenner switch doctors. Why did he do that? Well, it’s incentivized. This week it was announced that President Biden, instead of meeting victims’ families of the Nashville shooting, will meet with the state representatives who protested inside the Tennessee Capitol. The lesson, if only those families had hired acting coaches. 

Of course, it’s easy to blame politicians for this behavior. Which is why I do blame this on them. But we share some of the responsibility, too, as well. We, meaning the people who are paid to react to the news and the people who consume the news. We claim we want more people like Jeff Jackson, but we also cheer when someone from our team dunks on someone from their team, which isn’t often because most Republicans are white. I mean, it’s not like we don’t mind when politics starts looking like the WWE, but I don’t really want to see Adam Schiff wearing a singlet. Maybe I do. 

Fact is, the left are the experts at this crap, and they don’t stop. They incentivize infantile outbursts in college by rewarding activists with descriptions of bravery, just like what San Francisco State did to the mob who attacked Riley Gaines. They were lauded instead of lampooned, and Republicans can barely keep up with the drama because they’re so often the target. So what’s the ultimate consequence here? Well, this mob violence, mob rule, but now it’s sanctioned as protest, and it’s courtesy of amplified phony outrage.

After years of saying the country is racist, white people are racist, cops are racist, roads are racist, you end up with mob violence redefined as mostly peaceful protest, and businesses are now racist for not wanting to get looted. So because nothing is good, everything bad is permitted. 

And now we’re seeing it’s paralyzed a country, one that’s unable to respond to its own implosion. So congrats to Jeff Jackson, who has pulled back the curtain on this political theater. But I guess we always knew it. Just today, we’re paying the price.